My Fabulous Four-Day Weekend

Two weeks ago (better to post late than never) I had the best four-day weekend EVER! I stayed in Brescia for (almost) the whole weekend and got to meet a lot of locals. There are more people who speak English here than I thought. They’re all just hiding from me. Sneaky Brescians J

The fabulous Helleyne, who is a friend of the family that I work for, is 20 and studies in London. She’s half Brazilian, half Italian, grew up in Brescia and speaks perfect English…so she is like my personal heaven sent guide to the world of twenty-somethings here.  She was gracious enough to play tourist with me while she was home from school on Christmas break. J I think a cookie bouquet or bottle of wine may be in order. Thursday she and her boyfriend Roberto took me out for a few drinks and some live music. Piazza Arnaldo, which I have learned is the Friday night hang out of all of the locals , was pretty dead on a Thursday. But I tried my first ever Ginger Mojito, which was bitingly good.  After we hit up the Piazza we went dancing at Seconda Classe.

Seconda Classe is dance club that is moonlighting as a steakhouse/bar. While there are tables in the loft area and I assume food is served at some point in the evening, the cover charge, bouncers, and coat check scream CLUB to me. The main floor is taken up by a square bar in the middle and a stage in the corner and every other available space is packed with bodies. The cover bands that they book play a mixture of Italian and American hits and classics, so it’s fun for all ages, and believe me there are all ages present- as proven by the cougars and the 70-year-old man trolling for a date on the dance floor. When the band goes off, the DJ plays whatever he feels like, which is apparently I wide and random range of things. He played American top 40s, Nirvana, Italian soft rock, YMCA, some Brazilian stuff apparently, and some god awful house music. Italian clubs have taught me a new hatred for straight techno. I. Need. LYRICS. But most of the time what the DJ put on was a blast to dance to. I have ,however, reconfirmed in my mind that I have inherited my father’s rhythm (or lack thereof) and proceeded to make an ass of myself the whole evening next to Helly who studied hip-hop dancing for a decade. Oh well, she keeps it fun. I’ve decided that I’m also set back in a sense, because in Europe you actually have to learn to dance yourself whereas in America you aren’t required to since all you have to do is stick your ass out and wait for someone to dance behind you :P

I didn’t get home until 3:30 AM Thursday night, which kind of made the house here feel more like home since I’m nocturnal when I’m not chasing toddlers for a living.

Friday was a big day for me. I met my friend Anna for coffee, a bite of lunch, and some great conversation. After taking turns speaking in English and Italian, we decided to go shopping. Helly had invited me to go to a club with a group of her girlfriends that night and I needed a new outfit. Anna took me shopping and was very patient with me since she found nothing inspiring and everything I found fit horribly. But with her guidance I found a fabulous new top. We had to cut our date early so I could take the car back in time for them to go get the kids. It’s cheaper staying in Brescia, but it takes more coordination to share the car.

After I took the car back I went to the mall to attempt to find less homely work out clothes. I ended up buying a new dress and a great pair of shoes instead J Best find ever, the shoes were 10 Euros and are more comfortable than any heels I’ve ever owned. Thank you Nana for my new outfit J

I got sushi for dinner and then afterwards Helleyne picked me up to go out. The evening was a blur of new names and faces. Everyone was really chill and they all tried to speak English with me instead of Italian and make sure I understood was going on. I learned some new local slang, not all of which is appropriate for my reading audiences J but it was fun to pick up new vocab. We went to Piazza Arnaldo to get drinks and meet people, and I met about 15, half of which I remember their names- although I’m sure few remember mine, Caitlyn seems to be difficult for Italians to pronounce, even more so when intoxicated.  I was somewhat of a novelty for the evening as everyone kept introducing me as The American. Helly was fantastic at playing translator, even though I can pick up the drift of the conversation now. She’s also ideal to spot in a crowd since she’s like 6’1 and has an affinity for 3 inch heels, ideal for finding your way back to the group J She is an extremely gracious host and it helps that she knows practically everyone in Brescia.

Federica, Camilla, Francesca, Helly, and I were the ones that ended up going to the club afterwards. And it was a BLAST. We hit up a discotecha called the Circus in Brescia, which felt like something out of a movie.  There were platform dancers dressed up like Vegas show girls with sparkly leotards and giant feathers who set off the burlesque/circus décor nicely. This club was better people watching than it was dancing since all they played was house music, and as I’ve previously stated I can’t stand house music. Italy seriously throws off my gaydar because all of the men wear so much product in their hair, sport major chest hair and are still straight, while the girls wear no make-up, have buzz cuts, are rocking wife beaters but are there with their boyfriends. It’s really confusing for me.

It was fun to talk to the girls though. It’s difficult to go from living in a house of 50 women to having practically no girlfriends at all, so it was nice to be one of the girls again. Fede is crazy and she emits infectious fun. Camilla has the sharpest tongue ever for someone so tiny and she was the main reason for my vocabulary lesson. Francesca studied abroad in Dublin and we bonded over the greatness that is Ireland. Since I’m only slightly desperate to make more friends in Brescia, I bought a strategic round of vodka shots. They went over well even though it earned me the reputation of being a hardcore drinker, only a slight overstatement. Mostly I ordered vodka shots because I didn’t know how to translate Lemon Drop or Liquid Cocaine into Italian. Something to learn for next time. After an evening of crazy dancing and bottle service I dragged myself home at 4:30 am, a new club record for me J I was dead to the world most of the next day.

It was fine that I slept late because my plans for Saturday night were dinner with Anna and her gang at this great all you can eat pizzeria. She’s as excited to have a new friend as I am, so she showed me off all night like I just won first prize at the fair. I got to meet her husband Adriano, who is a faux painter, as well as some of her friends. The pizzeria was great the décor was adorable which I can appreciate. They also served really interesting stuff in addition to the classic stand bys. The apple, walnut, and gorgonzola was better than I thought, but the spicy sausage with basil (a more gourmet version of pepperoni) is still my favorite. It was a good dinner, and I only messed up slightly with my Italian. Anna was telling everyone how she’d had her 10^th anniversary at her job that week, and I mistook her thinking that a ten-year-old had come in and applied for a job that week. Oops. I was very rightly the butt of that joke for the rest of the evening. But if you can’t laugh at yourself life will be much less enjoyable.  

Sunday was sort of the day from hell. I decided to go into Milano to have lunch with Gabby, and from the moment I woke up I was in an alternate and extremely unlucky universe. I woke up late and then my cab to the station hit every red light. So when I got to the station I missed my train by 30 seconds. So I waited for the next train, but due to massive strikes by the regional train workers, the next 2 trains were cancelled. Since the regional trains were cancelled I had to upgrade my ticket to a high-speed train, and between that and my cab I used all my cash since the machine at the station wouldn’t take my card. Then when I got to Milano my metro ticket stopped working and I didn’t have money for another one. Then when I went to the ATM to get out more cash it wouldn’t accept my debit card. Neither would the other 3 ATMs I tried. So after another one of many panicked phone calls to Gabby, I did my best to look really sad and embarrassed and I bummed a ticket off of a very nice Scottish couple on vacation. My brother would be so proud. When I arrived for lunch 3 hours late, we made sure to go somewhere that accepted plastic. After lunch we made a trip to Arnold’s Coffee, which Gabby swears is the reincarnation of Starbucks in Milano. I believe it too since the logo is similar, the cups are white/black/green, and the line is out the door like they’re giving out money. Before standing in the giant line, we made sure to ask if they accepted credit cards, since Gabby was low on cash too. They assured us that they did, but what we found out after spending half an hour in line was that they only accept credit cards with the microchip. Stupid Europe, get with the magnetic strip already.

Monday was a heavenly and wonderful day. I went to Anna’s house in Brandico, which is about 20km from Brescia. She has a great house that is a perfect blend of her love of animals and her husband’s love of painting. They’ve got 2 cats, a dog, a garden tortoise, a beautiful aquarium, and countless fish. And nearly every room is beautifully faux painted. It’s a very cute and comfortable house. We had some coffee and talked a while, and then we took turns reading to each other. She reads so much better in English than I read in Italian. Apparently my pronunciation sounds ok, but I didn’t understand a damn thing I read. Italian has so many tenses!!!!! After that we watched a movie in English with Italian subtitles, the first time I’ve ever seen My Best Friends Girl (one of Anna’s favorites). After the movie we made Gnocchi alla Romagna, which is heavenly, delectable, buttery goodness in the form of gnocchi. Adriano also made us Chicken Marsala which was the best I’ve ever tasted. It was so much fun to cook because we took turns describing what we were doing in English and Italian. Educational and fun! It was like School House Rock but with red wine J After dinner, we decided to watch another movie before I overdosed on great food. We watched Avatar in Italian with English subtitles this time, and thanks mostly to the fact that I saw it 4 times in theaters, I understood almost all of it without reading the captions. I had to leave before it ended since it is a decent drive home and Monday was the end of my four day weekend. But it was an absolutely normal, relaxed, and PERFECT day. I can’t wait to do it again!

Things I’ve learned so far from clubs in Italy:

I am apparently the most obvious American in the world. I (happily) blame proper orthodontia. When people ran into the girls I was with they would automatically say “Scusi” and then if they bumped me they would look at me, hesitate and say “Oh, sorry” like it was stamped on my forehead that I speak English.

Shots is the same in English and Italian, the word, the concept and the lyrics.

Vodka is the same in English and Italian, thank god.

Shots in Italy are twice as expensive but twice as much fun.

Bottle service does exist in places other than MTV reality shows.

I am really really short. I know it- but I forget until I get lost in crowds.

Techo slowly murders the soul.

I cannot actually dance, although I can fake dance, which seems to get me by. This does not stop me from getting hit on by random guys, probably for the aforementioned fact that I’m am very obviously American which, for some reason beyond me, holds appeal for Italians.